I sat pondering this fine Saturday morning about a wide range of things, even considering my cloudy early-morning-brain. First, I was wondering where my grand daughter was, because I was supposed to babysit this morning. Then, I started thinking about what Mike and I would do when he got off work and, finally, what would I write about today. I have made a commitment to myself to post something everyday. As things turned out, my hubby and son-in-law finished early, and he (son-in-law) took my cute little girly home with him, so all I had to think about was what was I gonna write.
I migrated from my G-baby to thinking about how to set a goal. What would be a good goal to set? Not one so hard that it can’t be reached in a reasonable time. Then, hocus-pocus and abracadabra, magically, on the television, a young girl hopped in her beaus’ strong arms and kissed him for a while …. Now, that is a goal I could see myself shooting for. 🙂 I would LOVE to jump in up in my Mikey’s arms. I would LOVE to be small enough for Mike to pick me up in his strong arms and kiss me …. without the worry of breaking his back. I have to tell you I am at least 80 pounds from that one … actually, it may never be possible, because even 80 pounds lighter I would weigh 150 pounds — that is a lot to pick up and twirl around — even though Mike is strong. Back to the drawing board — what would be a more realistic goal? Well, I know what pressed forefront in my mind — to weigh less than Mikey. To take that goal back even smaller, I would like to weight less than 220.
As I sit here working to keep myself doing just as Dr. Ard tells me to do …. not thinking about what might happen or might NOT happen. I am sure this is why I am having a hard time setting my goals. I do not know how to deal with this next, and very crucial blockade that faces me — just around the corner — maybe even now. I am aware that I am but 5.5 pounds from the bounce back point. Fear
and trembling surges through my soul when I say the words aloud–writing them down is horrifying–it seems, oddly enough, that this act makes my thoughts … LAW … and increases probability the dreaded doom wall, not just a frivolous concern. Looming like a black cloud in front of my hopeful horizon …. is the wonder … will I break the 220 point or will I stall out as before?
The good news is I am only 5.5 pounds from where I was this time last year — so that means I am smaller and on my way to being healthier — very good things. I have much more support this time around and DR’s who don’t take lightly the things I have endured in the past. They do not ply me with with trite cliches: “Push back from the table,” “if you put more into it this you would get more out of it,” and the beat goes on. Nor have they suggested that maybe I get up in my sleep and eat as a plausible reason for why I can move no further. These doctors, trainers, friends, and family all know that I am giving it my all … and so do you … I guess if you can believe what you read. 🙂 This is what is different …. this time … I tell myself over and over that THIS time things are different, and that I will move forward and I will get to the place where I weigh less than Mikey.
So my goal for the next two weeks is to break 230.
Goal for the month would be to make it to 225
These may be a stretch, given that the next few weeks the weight loss norms for OptiFast should be on target to slow way down. =( If they are I will have to just reevaluate them and come at it again. Even if all I lose is a pound — that is a pound in the right direction. That is what I tell myself when I drink these shakes day after day …. Onward and upward, never give up and never quit — Never ever quit!
Later this evening, we dance. Can you see me smile? I love Dancing as much as bike riding — both make me laugh, smile, and have a happy mind set.
So, Cheers …. warm sunny wishes …..S