Weigh In #31 … and the Evil Dr. Ard

Blah, Blah, Blah …. Whatever!

The Evil Dr. Ard ~~ Yes, this is the real man. Click on the picture and it will take you to the article about him.

I am not wearing my happy face today, and it is not just because the scales didn’t give me the number I was looking for either.  I had my plan, thought it out and decided what I wanted to do … was acting on that plan.  Lindsey felt she could come up with a good food plan, but she wanted me to talk with Dr. Ard before we changed anything.  WHAHHH!  He looked over at me with that sweet smile (after listening to me), and said, I want you to go back to stage one of Transition eating only one meal a day.  4 oz lean meat and 1 cup raw veggies or 1/2 cut cooked veggies.  I am SICK OF OPTIFAST shakes … just sayin’ … I wanted to eat REAL FOOD.

I smiled at him when what I wanted to do was cry, because I was so mad I could barely see straight.  Mad at Dr. Ard?  NO, just sick and (insert bad word here) tired of sweet shakes.  I don’t like sweet food.  It’s my body: I have a right to make the plans for my body … so why am I allowing Dr. Ard after 5 minutes of listening and considering to shoot all my plans to pieces?  Well, I trust him and his smiley self.  He has gotten me this far, even if I don’t like his plan, I owe it to myself to listen to what he tells me.  Up to this point, he has been able to help me maneuver around multitudinous obstacles for successful weight loss.  I know that I sure don’t want to gain the 70+ pounds back!  Do I like his plan.  NOOOOOOO!!  Thus the reason for the shark attack in the pool, not for the reasons you might suppose.  I am the shark … that is a good picture of the anger that rose up in me at having to eat like this again.

I thought this was a great mental picture. 🙂

I came home in a snit.  Walked in and ate 12 rice thins (which is only slightly more than 1/2 a serving or portion) with a wedge of Laughing Cow Cheese (that is an unusual name for a cheese by-the-way); once that was consumed, I made the wise decision to have a grilled cheese and french fries for my second lunch.  I made said grilled cheese with thick slices of Italian bread slathered with real butter, with three slices of three varieties of the most decadent cheeses melted to perfection between perfectly golden crisped bread, washed down with an ice cold diet soda.  Ahhh!  The last meal of the condemned … yes I felt sentenced to eternal torture.  Well, I know that is a touch over dramatized, but this has been six months of a liquid diet … and I have to tell you: enough is enough.

Don’t get me wrong; it isn’t that OptiFast is a bad product, because it isn’t.  It is a good product, and it works well with my body.  I am just sick of it.  I was mentally set for a break.  Healthy food break, but when they shot my plans to hell, well, I went postal.  I went for fat laden comfort food. I feel better now that I ate my yummy grilled cheese.  I have no guilt or shame for eating it.  I was worth the cost.  I LOVED IT! Now I feel like I can face this problem again.  So, Today, I am not obeying Dr. Ard.  I am going to eat what I want to.  Just today.  Tomorrow, I will follow orders.

He feels that the reason for my up and down weight has to do with my sleep … or rather the lack of sleep for the better part of 2 months.  He made good arguments, and I know he knows his stuff, so the Evil/Sweet Dr. Ard’s suggestions must be followed.  I know he is right about losing, and I hope he is right that the reason I am struggling is the lack of sleep.  He fixed that today by getting my meds ordered.  So tonight I should sleep the sleep of the righteous even though I am more like the demented today.

Gotta love this loseit.com report! YUM! 😐

Just so you know, I do not feel bad about the 3.5 pound weight gain: I expected it.  You can’t add weights in without a gain, or let me rephrase that … I can’t add them in without a gain.  I am OK with the upward motion of the mean-nasty-bad-cruel scales; it was planned for.  I was not OK with the plan change; that I was NOT prepared for.  I have, however, become increasingly more OK with Dr. Ard’s diet plan change –as my food orgy has worked to settled my nerves.  I hear him saying that I can do this, once I get sleep.   I tell myself: he knows his stuff … you gotta listen.

So, I will listen and obey, even though I do NOT wish too.  I want to reach my goal, and I want to keep my weight off … for life.

Don’t worry about me; I am gonna be OK.  I just had to wrap my brain around this new plan.  I wish I could have cried, because I know I would have felt better faster, and without food.  I just do not cry easily, instead I growl, fuss, rage, and often times cuss till I feel better.   I did that with my loving and supportive hubby.  He is the best, in case you missed that.    🙂

            • I am going to trust Dr. Ard.
            • I must!
            • I will be OK!
            • I have come toooooo far to quit now.
            • I won’t quit, ‘cuz I don’t know how …just sayin’.
            • Besides I am more better now.    🙂

Until tomorrow sweet friends … S

19 thoughts on “Weigh In #31 … and the Evil Dr. Ard

  1. Although I am not happy that you’re having such a tough time, it is most refreshing to see someone else hating the sweet creamy milk products. I had to skip the description of the grilled cheese, though. I’m just having to force myself to believe that “real” food doesn’t exist. Like I’m living my dream of being an astronaut and all that is available to eat is Optifast.

    • Thanks Cookie for stopping by and reading. You know it means the world. I LOVE your play that you are acting in. 🙂 Don’t read the food descriptions if it makes you grummly. Hang on girl you are doing so good! Very impressed with your movie outing. 🙂

  2. I WANT A (insert bad word here) GRILLED CHEESE! You almost had me in sweat! I commend you for sticking so well to a liquid diet, I am not so certain I would have done as well. My idea of a liquid diet usually refers to a nice Pinot Noir! ; )

    Now I can’t get the buttery grilled cheese out of my head, darn!

    • hhahaha! I know, so did I yesterday. Thank God I don’t today. That would be terrible. All I want today is real food. That has been my challenge today. Real, good, and healthy food that I am not allowed to have.

      Thanks for the vote of confidence I need to dwell on those kind words as I move forward. I have commited to follow through and I will. I may whine a lot, but I will make it through. 🙂

      Forget the cheese girl … it makes ya gassy … just sayin’.

  3. I love cheese, grilled sliced or however so you had me drueling over the post, in a polite way of course. As to the weight loss I know itreally sucks tyo keep eating the same kind of stuff day after day but you have done so well I feel really proud of you. Now is’nt that silly but you know what I mean

    • I do know what you mean. I know how silly it sounds to your mind when you type out “I’m proud of you” to a grown person, but I also know how great it feels right now that you said it to me. Thanks! I think we need to know that others are proud of our efforts, especially when we feel so weak and wobbly about them.

  4. That grilled cheese sounded amazing by the way!
    I think you should leave Week 1 maintenance on the table for the rest of your life.
    It is always an option to jump start your body back into weight loss.
    Our nutritionist says you should always go back to Week 1 when you gain 5 – 10 lbs. (whatever you are comfortable with).

    Good luck and get some sleep (2:21am)

    • It was AMAZING OL! It was so satisfying I could barely make up my mind what to do about dinner. but I did. hehehe … as you will see if you read todays post.

      You are right about the week 1. I am not doing it perfect today, but there was too much food that would have gone bad–no one would eat it but me. So, I am moving gradually this week toward that week 1 food. YUCK! just whinnin’

      Thanks and I slept soooo good. It was awesome! 🙂

  5. I know this was hard news to hear. “Real” food is lovely, and Optifast products, not so much. But I also trust the doctor, and maybe this is what you need right now. I do think you are right about sleep. Our Kaiser doctors have told stories about folks having plateaus where they were doing everything else right except getting enough sleep. So I hope you are also able to get some quality sleep!

    • You are so right OB, it was VERY hard to hear. Very hard indeed. But I want to finish my race. So now I hunker down and give it my all!

      I have to tell you OB, my stomach was flatter this morning after ONE nights sleep. It was amazing by the way. Mentally, I feel so positive like I really CAN do this. Thanks for understanding and standing by me. 🙂

      MEANS A LOT!

  6. “Cha cha cha changes; turn and face the strain; cha cha changes” We had our plan. The expert changed it. You will roll with it and win. That’s why we have experts. And “The Evil” Dr. Ard has proven himself one.

  7. Well my darling Shonnie… this is a hard job we have… but we know… that the rewards are well worth the short term stress! You have to trust in Dr Ard… btw… is that picture REALLY him? After all this time – this is DR ARD? if it is I feel I need to go on Optifast straight away and visit him regularly lol he is very cute! Just saying 😉

    So………… right now, you’ve had a lovely little splurge and now it’s time to get back on that horse cowgirl! I’ve gotten right back on it too and we can ride off together into the sunset of babedom… because you know that is EXACTLY where we are heading 😉

    Seriously… you are doing right to trust in him – he knows what he is talking about I’m sure – and he is going to help you get to where YOU want to be 🙂 Even though I love my DC – I do understand how you can want to make your own decisions and eat ‘real food’ and you can do that again – but you need to be in a place where you can do it safely and it’s better to get there slowly than not get there at all!

    Giving you trillions of virtual hugs my dear dieting darling friend! xxx

    • Oh, yes that is the one and only Dr. Ard. He is a sweetheart. I do trust him and he always laughs when he tells me what I do not want to hear.

      I did have a lovely splurge … and girl it was lovely … I’m just sayin’ hehe

      I just did not want to keep pushing with this when I was not getting anywhere, but it could be the sleep and if that is the case I will NOT mind pushing forward with weight loss.

      Thanks as always for being there. 🙂

  8. Girl-I’ve been negligent in following your posts lately so I was unaware of the roller coaster ride. You’re still an inspiration to continue this fight for as long as you have without throwing in the towel. Listen to the sweet and evil Dr. Ard. He has brought you to a place oo one else could. I’m proud of you and cant wait to see your skinny self.

    • I can’t wait to see you Tricia my dear sweet friend. I am gonna listen to him. You are so right … he has brought me so far. So very far. It won’t be long before I see you … got my tickets … just gotta get my room. 🙂

  9. Hey I know exactly how you’re feeling. Look at is this way you’ve done extremely well, well enough to make it to weigh in 31 so congrats on that. I don’t remember what weigh in I was on before I quit the program. I really want to come back, but like you I want real food. I keep fighting with myself whether to go back to the shakes, or to continue to real food, but real food is what’s causing me to have major back pains again( go figure!) To me once I got tired of the shakes they began to taste a little funny lol. Maybe it was just me.

    Dr.Ard isn’t that bad in fact I’d rather see him than the other doctors up there. My mother and I like teasing him and making him smile. Again you been doing so good on your plan. So I wish you much success on your continued Journey.

    • Thanks Nesha!

      You are so sweet to come over and check on me. Thanks for the well wishes, they mean the world to me girl. I so wish you would come back. I miss seeing you and your mom.

      I love Dr. Ard … he knows that I call him the Evil Dr. Ard, but only in jest. It is because he is the opposite of evil that it is OK to call him that. He always laughs at me when I say it. Today, as with everytime he tells me something he knows I don’t want to hear, he smiles really big.

      Hugs girl. 🙂

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