I know I’ve been quiet.
I know I have been slack.
It’s hard to constantly talk about failure. I’m not a failure, even though I’ve had one
Mostly I’m healthy.
My Daughter is getting Married. Yes, I like the guy. Living in two places makes it harder than I expected, but is a great break from all the physical work of building the deck for her woodland wedding.
I’ve been hiding from my blog in general. I don’t take many photos.
I’m pretty devastated to be back in this place still. All my attempts to reverse my setbacks have failed. BUT just because I have been quiet doesn’t mean I haven’t been out here pressing in.
I’ve have been out here working my self pissy. Who wants to hear the angry woman rant all the time. When I get quiet I’m scary mad. I’ve wanted to hurt something for quiet a while.
I’m a positive person with a super-sized side of Anger over the fat issue. I hate going out in public. I’ve become a non-person again. The whole thing makes me want to rip something apart with my bare hands. So I’m building a flipin Deck. Shoveling dirt and raking rocks.
So the deck is a positive for anger management.
Anyhow–gonna try to write again.