I went out for a ride this AM … if I don’t hit the road before 7 am I am seriously dying from the heat. I woke straight up at 5:30 … so I got myself moving with a jolt of leftover Nuked coffee. Yep, I put on the skin tight clothes made for a body that looks better than mine naked and my reflective construction worker jacket so I might live …. you know … a girls gotta keep safe from the drunks from last night driving home and the folks having to drive for work who are not REALLY awake.
I pumped up my tires, turned on my MapMyRide app, had my pop music revved up in my ears, then I hopped on my bike to work on getting my body back in its grove of fit. It Felt GREAT! But I forgot to put my electrolytes in my water bottle and I bonked short of my goal. I had to turn around early. I still made it further than the last ride. I am happy with myself.
Living in a tourist area you see a lot of different faces when you get out in the morning, but a few faces become familiar. Most folks smile and acknowledge that we are all out there getting our sweat on, but those you see regularly–the smile gets bigger and it is almost comforting and encouraging for both passers–at least that is how it feels to me. Except for these two mostly fit women.
These same two women, I have seen for the last few months. The first time I passed them they smiled at me … kinda condescendingly … but still it was a smile. As time has gone on, they barely look at me. They can be laughing and talking and then they stop and look at me as though they just smelled a bad smell. At first I didn’t think much about it until it became a regular thing. I suppose it is possible that I am leaving a foul smell in my wake, but most likely they are judging me in some fashion … most likely to make themselves feel better.
Why am I wasting space talking about this? Hoping that maybe I can spare some folks suffering and pain over such treatment. I have run into these type women over and over again. They are reasonably thin … but not really all that fit. They are flabby, middle aged and mostly thin. They wear normal sized clothes, but they have rolls and pudges. You would expect such NON-fit women to be supportive of those of us larger girls out there workin’ out, but 9 times out of 10 they will judge you. They aren’t successful enough to be gracious and probably have NEVER had to struggle to work to lose 50, 60, or 100 plus pounds … so they do not walk in mercy. Judging a fluffy person makes them feel better about themselves … and they need to feel better. They are the type of person who needs other people to be beneath them to feel good about themselves.
So … let their rejection slide off you. Don’t take it in. They are small in their own minds, and they reach out and stab at you with small things to enhance their own broken self image. I have found that people who behave this way and have to make other people small are extremely broken people, so comfort yourself with this knowledge–the problem is with them NOT YOU. Do not measure yourself by their measuring stick or you will never find a place of peace. These tormented souls are never at peace about anything. The only time they measure up in their own mind is when they can find someone smaller than themselves. Surround yourself as much as possible with people who can cheer you own even when they are down. Don’t waste time or energy on people who cannot be happy for you at every stage of your journey–regardless of their own state.
If you are fluffy and you are out there getting your sweat on you are ROCKIN’ it! If you are like me and you do it even though half the time you don’t getting anything other than tight fat –you get bonus rad points … at least that is what I tell myself! It’s my story … and … I am stickin’ with it! hehehe
It’s 9 am and I have ridden my bike, went for a swim in the Gulf, cleaned my kitchen, and written this blog post …. now … I have to decide what I am going to do with the rest of my day. Man I feel energized!