After yesterdays blissful family blessing meal on the “Wedding Deck“ I had to FAST until 11:30 am today. Can I tell you … DYING is what it felt like. My body was angry with me for not feeding it. Mind you I have enough FAT that if could be WELL fed for probably six months if … if only it would just eat my blanking fat stores! But NO it has to HOLD on to them for me–like I am starving!!! I had to turn the TV off because people on every channel were SMACKING food … I mean EVERYWHERE! (I will save my feelings on smacking for another day.)
And yes … I am over grieving … it is time to get on with LIVING.
I went had had my Blood letting done, and while I was there for that I made an appointment with ‘The Dietitian‘ to get back started kicking Fats Butt after all my illnesses and injuries. I am hopping along pretty good, in the gimp department, at the moment so felt like it was time to again breach the diet gap. Sigh.
I had my annual blood letting to appease the hormone doc and make her happy with me. Also, you know the simi-important stuff … that shows I am not officially turning into a male or some other such things. Given the size of my breast … I would have to say I am very decidedly female. Have I mentioned that I HATE going to the doctor? I really do … and I hate it even worse when I have to go in FAT!!!!!!
I step on the scale …. but I close MY eyes and Do NOT look at it. Mike looks. He takes the BMI index and assorted other crap info that spews out of the machine. I, of course, have Gained AGAIN. Not surprising. Not after yesterdays meal. Even though much of it was very healthy, it was pretty high in carbs for me, and that makes me SWELL up and boy was I puffy.
This lady is new, as is my doc … Have I mentioned I HATE new in docs? I don’t like changing docs, but such is life, folks move on. The Evil Doctor Ard is far away in North Carolina. I had to make changes. I had to bite the bullet. I don’t seem to lose without some MAJOR shifting in diet. Crazy crap. So here we go, off on another fat loss adventure, ‘The Dietitian’ seems to feel like she can help me transition out of this hole fat trap that I am in with a shock-to-ya-body-diet, and then phase me over to real sustainable eating. I hope she is right. If not … I guess I will be off looking for a new sports med. and nutrition doc. Actually, I am going to be looking for those folks anyway. I need someone who understands my need to peddle, swim, and paddle–them’s my happy pills.
Now … for a few days … I’mma ’bout to party like its Mardi Gras or my life depended on it. Then, I will calmly and serenely dive in. Well, it is part of the plan with her too … but I am deciding if it is going to be a BIGGER and LONGER party than normal. Seeing I won’t be drinking for MONTHS! So, if you see this Fat girl actin a fool … just pass on by and Don’t be Hatin’ or Judging. Just KNOW she is getting her freak on cuz gettin down to business is just up ahead–and life is way more than being skinny.
Heck … I wouldn’t even be bothering with this AT all, but my gut is getting in the way of my biking. With every peddle my thigh rams my gut up through my nose … a girl can’t be bothering with that kind of flab. You just gotta kick it.
I will check back with you and let you know what I decided to do. Party like its 1999 all week or jump off in the wild and wonderful world of F’ing body shock land!
P.S. Hahaha …. did you read all the way through this post looking for the large breasts … hahahaha made you look. I don’t know what is wrong with me … but I just felt like being all bait and switch today. I started to call my post, I am not Cait … but I wasn’t sure anyone would get my joke. She is on female hormones and I am male hormones …. just made me laugh.