I’m in pain.
I do mean serious pain. It’s the 3rd day and I am supposed to workout to fail again today.
I’m struggling with how I will do a workout of ANY kind today. I’ve suffered serious pain from a 10 minute workout. A workout that I did not even feel burn in my legs while I was doing the kettle bells. I did run out of breath with each set and it got to where I couldn’t get past 8 reps without intense focus–FAST! I was disappointed that I could not do 15 minutes of workout–which is the super short goal of the program I am about to start–not disappointed in me anymore after all the pain. Something about the way that you do the HIIT is extraordinarily effective. WOW. OUCH. WHINE!
Yesterday was REST Day. Rest day consists of move as normal and a 20 minute walk. HAHAHAHAHA! Movement of any kind was an extreme effort and did not resemble graceful or normal. I’m not sure if I did this all day, but I did catch myself breathing loudly just to walk through Walmart–I guess that I am now part of “The People of Walmart.” If you see a video called “The Heavy Breather Lady” it was probably me.
I made myself dress (I promise you it was a chore!) and go out for a walk in the beautiful sunshine to look at the fantastic Gulf of Mexico and listen to the waves. It was lovely. I enjoyed being out there in the sunshine. I walked further than I planned. Longer than was required. I took rests. Hahahahahahaha! I could barley make it back. I stretched and was a complete mental blob from that point on.
Observations after learning my new program:
- I’m out of shape worse than I thought. I mean I knew it was bad–telling myself this means I am going to see some great changes. Hahahahahahaha! The power of positive thinking.
- Going to the bathroom is a chore. I have a handicap potty in my bathroom–it sits higher than the normal potty. Does this help? NO! I scream or groan in agony everytime I go potty. I use the term “Potty,” because it feels as though I have entered my second childhood. Controlling your potty breaks with grace and ease is something normally taken for granted–NOT the past two days. My spasmodic muscles that control my squat on the pot seriously effect my abilities to make a controled expulsions of refuse.
- Bras are from the devil. Just in case you wondered. I hate them. How do you put one on when everything on you hurts??? These evil spawns of satan cut and bind poor tender muscles–I need one of those soft bamaboo bras I saw on TV. I’m serious Mike–are you reading this–find me one! Today! While I am doing this program and until I get over being sore–if I ever do–I have to find SOFT clothing and slip on shoes.
- Bending over for any reason or thing is a JOKE. I’ve screamed a lot …
I don’t remember when I realized the windows were still open, but it was surely after many screams. Bending over. Going to the bathroom–which I did a lot of because I am dumping fluids–Hahahahahahaha! Trying to put clothes on to go to the store–the agony of a bra–who knew! Somewhere in the day I realized the windows had been left open. No cops have arrived to date, so I suppose this means my neighbors did not hear the screaming or they think we are into S&M.
Especially, after Mike took the rod of torture to my legs–he almost got racked for his efforts. That evil device is supposed to make you hurt less AFTER it makes you scream out of your mind in agony. In theory it stimulates blood flow to your body when you roll its knobby surface over the sore and afflicted areas of your person. Drunk is what I needed to be when Mike started caring for me with this devil device. I may have to break protocol and have a drink tonight. It worked after a fashion–I no longer scream when I roll over in bed. I should bend over, scream, and pick up the roller bar and apply it to my legs myself so that I begin to feel better–I am seriously considering doing this.
What does this make me? A sadist? I am beginning to wonder about myself that I laugh when I am in intense pain.
I’ve decided, just this moment, that it means I am super mentally healthy, because I can laugh at myself in the midst of my self-inflicted torment. One should pump ones self up. I’m just saying!
Cover your ears I am about to scream and throw a slight fit because my clothes to workout are in the bottom dresser drawer! Hahahahahahaha!
I’ll let you know how I make out…