I kinda suck …

IMG_2560At writing since March. I have had a difficult time writing because I could not get this pad to log into WordPress via my app. I’m kinda tickled that it let me today. Who knows about tomorrow. Hahahaha. I don’t like this formate–I’ve logged in via the net, but I was unaware I could do that–so, this is GREAT!  Yay me!

I’d tell you I will be writing every day, but there have been tons of things blocking me. Most importantly, my working on building my strength back after the horrific allergic reaction that jacked up my bp numbers, it has taken much longer than expected. I am back to building. I am back to being the Fat Woman too. So stinking embarrassing.

I hate!!!!!! Walking around people, because I sound like a heavy breather phone perv. 🙄🙄😛😛. I hate being the fat woman. I hate that I’m having to start all over yet again. It pisses me off. I hate the stares from rude people when I’m in my workout clothes–cuz girl gets too hot to cover this flub up!!  Just sayin’.

I am glad for my continued progress over the past few months. When I started back walking I would vomit. Now, I just have to take breaks and I feel confident enough to walk alone and get on my bike again after MONTHS of being grounded. So, in the midst of self loathing I’m proud of myself for pushing through–my indomitable spirit is one of my best attributes–I don’t know how to give up on me.

Below is my weeks view save today–haven’t made it out yet

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2 thoughts on “I kinda suck …

  1. Shonnie – I lost track of you. When Google reader stopped then I stopped keeping track of my blogs. So I will try to subscribe to you.
    You’ve been thru hell. I’m sorry. But you still move forward. One step up and 2 back perhaps bit you are still here, still dping your thing and still angry!!! Yes!!!!
    I’m fine. Or I will be fine after my second knee replacement surgery. I’ve actually lost weight thru this process – pain meds, pain and anesthesia leave me without an appetite for a long time. Just got it back after the first knee surgery and next week is the second one.

    I can’t complain. I’m blessed. Good friends and family and I am liking my job. I’ll be back in action soon. Can’t wait. Wish the same for you.

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